I'm feeling a little out of sorts tonight.
I'm trying to keep a lid on the stress from work that has been toying with me for the last three weeks and that, hopefully, will fade away later this week when my job returns to `normal'.
I fear that I have alienated a friend who I consider a very good mate, and someone who really gives me a lift when I need one just by speaking to him. It's not really a long story but he called me a couple of days ago and I was really distracted and wasn't concentrating on what he was saying. I think he may have thought I was disinterested and my housemate often says I have a `cold' phone manner at times. I have apologised for it by way of a voice mail message but, as yet I haven't heard back.
I am frustrated by recurring feelings of alienation from my church family.
I'm disappointed that I can't go on the church weekend away, thus making me feel more removed. It doesn't help that I have to work but given the weekend is a good few hours away it makes dropping in unrealistic.
I feel fairly good, health wise, but still feel damaged. This makes the prospect of such trips away a much bigger deal.
I know that I'm feeling out of sorts because I find myself listening to songs that I shouldn't, that don't do good things for my mood.
Some of those songs are: Weathered by Creed; Untitled (How Could This Happen To Me?) by Simple Plan; I Don't Know You Anymore by Savage Garden; The Freshmen by The Verve Pipe; Close My Eyes by Mariah Carey; Unlovable by Darren Hayes; Bring Me To Life by Evanescence; and All I Want Is Everything by Def Leppard.
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