Altered states

The last few days have been a mixed bag.
My return to work lasted two days (though I did some work from home on Thursday and Friday) and, unfortunately, life has been dominated by wildly differing states of health.
For those who don't know exactly what I am talking about I wrote this on this page back in June explaining what the issue is.
I honestly don't know how I feel. On any given day it can vary from very crummy to reasonably normal and it is very confusing.
Such is the nature of what's going on I don't know how long it will take to right itself. And I don't know what I have to go through between now and then. Trying to go to work as well, so as to give myself something to do, can be tricky but at the same time can be quite fine.
I'm looking for one or two positive signs from the symptoms to give me confidence that it is on the improve and hopefully they will come soon. Having only been treating it with stronger medication for four days I shouldn't expect instant results. But that's the problem, I want instant results.
During the time of doing basically nothing for four days I have taken the time to read passages from the Bible, mainly from James and Philippians about perseverence and some of the Psalms (particularly Psalm 30 which says `weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning').
I've got to say this is really hard, and it's difficult to get into the Christmas spirit. In the light of what I wrote back in June though I know that I will get through it. I am more positive about it than I was the first time, though it still freaks me out and takes an emotional toll, and I think I will learn an awful lot more about it as a result of this time.