Out of focus

It's really time that I got a bit of direction.
Sure, I've been coasting along reasonably well (considering a few things) and could quite easily continue that way. But I think I'll look back in five years or so and wish I'd handled things differently.
I certainly feel that way about myself five years ago at the moment.
Knowing what I know now, I really do regret not taking a few more risks then and not challenging myself at a time when I didn't think I had the strength to cope with them.
Now that I know I have the strength to handle more than I thought I have to take that confidence and ensure that I'm not the same person come 2017. You know what I mean.
In some ways I hope I am the same person but I need to be enhanced. Sure, physically I need some improvement and I must set a proper goal with my exercise program (or lack thereof the past few weeks).
What I'd really like by Christmas (since that's is a widely accepted end-time goal), or summer at least, is to have lost 5kg and be undertaking a proper exercise regime.
I have a distinct lack of focus these days. I've been distracted by certain things, things I have and am enjoying, and I think I've lost a bit of sight of what is actually a healthy lifestyle (by this I don't mean the exercise stuff, more what is considered emotionally healthy) and how to incorporate a number of aspects of life without affecting work and social aspects.
It's very important that I don't just note this down and then go away and ignore it.
This week I plan to stop into my gym (which is at work conveniently) and arrange to have a program worked out for me to start when I get back from holidays. In the couple of weeks of that break from work I need to ensure I'm exercising a bit and watching what I eat more.
I can't stress how important it is that I am able to lose the 5kg. It would actually be a pretty big psychological win because weight loss has long been something I have feared. That might sound like a silly statement but there is a very good reason for it.