Why is it that I could walk outside right now and not feel particularly threatened but I can sit in the comfort of home and feel so vulnerable?
Welcome to my world!
A world where, sometimes despite my best efforts, anxiety seems to reign. I can be in a perfectly enjoyable scenario yet feel so many things going on in the body that I have to pay attention. I hate it. And even though that is a very strong emotion I have to stand by it.
Why is it that I can be so easily distracted when everything is great but if you're feeling a bit low or not yourself it can be so hard to snap out of?
One thing I know is that I can't let this thing beat me. I'm not a particularly tough guy, outwardly, but beating off this mindset requires toughness.
People with depression refer to it as 'the black dog' and while I have been through that it doesn't describe how anxiety can get on top of you.
It's kind of like an electrical storm, with random lightning strikes.
I write this at the end of a day that has been a bit of a battle and in the hope that tomorrow is a better one.
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