Tapering

I think I'm on my third or fourth attempt at tapering off the anti-depressants I've been using for almost seven years now.
It seems like longer in some respects. Then again you get so used to taking them they become just a part of the routine.
But that's the important thing - routine. It's imperative that things change in that area. it is all well and good to have a routine, or series of habits, but you can't get too comfortable.
For a while now it has been on my radar that some things need to change. Certainly in the last six to nine months I have done some things differently, had some new experiences and taken a few more risks.
Some of those risks have been worthwhile, others have not been so successful.
I also went through an extended period of restraining from gambling. I did that with a fair degree of success though did begin to slip up towards the end. It was still a win, pun kind of intended.
The anti-depressants are a crutch in a way but at the same time they are a burden.
They make you feel nothing. Well, more to the point they have you in perpetual state of 'meh'. That gets frustrating.
One of the changes I am proud of is being able to make at least a semi-regular commitment to going to the gym. I certainly have noticed the difference and I think it has contributed a fair bit towards getting as far along with the tapering that I have to date.
I am half way there. For the first time in my attempts of reduction I have made it to the half way mark and while I am experiencing a bit of the headache-type withdrawl symptoms they aren't too bad at this stage. I figure if I can get through another week or so I might be ready to make a further reduction and then the finish line will be in sight.
I definitely feel some benefits from being on the reduced amount....the 'meh' feeling isn't so pronounced but I have to be wary that I need to be vigilant in keeping up the natural production of serotonin.
It will be an achievement of no small amount when I reach the goal of being anti-depressant free.