Sunday, May 27, 2012

Farewell One Tree Hill

It's the show I named the blog after so I had better offer comment on the series' final season, which I finished watching back in April.
One Tree Hill isn't a show that was given much air time here in Australia and I wound up watching it on the net over the final three seasons. If the many TV channels here can't find a spot for it I was always going to watch it however I could.
Now the show could have wrapped up happily after the sixth season when Lucas and Peyton, OTH's two central characters by this stage, drove off into the sunset.
But it pressed on and evolved and managed to remain fresh. Though it took a little while.
I was pleased when they finished up season 8 and announced it would return for a final season - not a lot of shows are given the chance to finish on their own terms.
We saw a few characters return during the course of season 9 - Chris Keller, who I always hated because he spoke in the third person far too much, Dan Scott had a much larger role, Deb also bobbed up and even Lucas made what I viewed as a wasted cameo for an episode.
The central plot of Nathan's kidnapping was far fetched but, then again, it is a soap and if I had a problem with that then why didn't I give up around the time of Peyton's crazy stalker who pretended to be her brother?
In a way I think the final time jump was unnecessary - I didn't need to know that Jamie would become a champion basketballer (he certainly grew a couple of feet as a teenager!) but going back to the start (with basketball the central focus) worked well all season so why not finish off the same way.
Music has always been central to the show and it was a nice touch that Gavin Degraw came back to sing I Don't Want To Be (the show's theme) in the final episode - repeating his appearance in the very first where he also performed the song.
Few shows can last nine seasons, especially the teen-type series. Look at similar shows - The OC (4 seasons), Dawson's Creek (6 seasons) - they haven't made it nearly as far and that is a credit to Mark Schwahn and how he has continually reinvented it. Sure, it did miss Lucas and Peyton in the last couple of seasons and I would have liked to have seen Rachel return one more time but I'm very glad I came across One Tree Hill.
It was time well spent.

What else is out there?

I'm sure it is a question that everyone ponders at some stage - is there more? What else could/should I be doing?
For want of a better term, my 'mojo' took a bit of a hit this last week and it has left me thinking about where things stand at the moment.
I'm not going to rush out and make significant changes or anything like that, a lot of things still stand - I love my job and everything it allows me to do, but outside of that I am wondering where I'm headed.
Part of having the type of job I do is you have a lot of exposure to the gambling industry and at times this has tripped me up. After taking three months off gambling (and only slipping up slightly a couple of times) I know that I can survive without having a bet. But, like any habit, it is difficult to rein it in (pun sort of intended).
I do enjoy going to the movies and, possibly due to there being not a lot of interesting films around, I'm a bit down on the number I've seen approaching the halfway mark in the year.
I managed to go for a swim yesterday and quite enjoyed it and I know I haven't been as regular in taking my ipod for a walk ;-) lately. Though I am happy to say the gym doesn't hold as many fears as it used to, it is still a very intimidating place but I'm able to go.
I still feel the need to protect myself, in a way, though and that can be restrictive. Nowhere near as much as a few years back, I should say.
I think a bit of the problem, in general terms, is focus. I can be easily distracted at times and perhaps that is the first step.

Friday, May 25, 2012

Shame

I saw Shame a few months ago but didn't get around to doing a review.
Let me start by saying this isn't for everyone, it's a movie about addiction - sex addiction in this case - and it is graphic at times (I don't just mean in terms of sex).
It focuses on Brandon (Michael Fassbender), a New York professional whose life is dictated by his sex addiction. He is actively distracted by the need to engage in pretty much any kind of sexual activity, he's not against paying for it and he'll shell out for a hotel room if need be. He looks at porn on his work computer and, at one point, goes to a place where he knows he'll get what he wants after almost being beaten to death by the boyfriend of a woman he's trying to seduce (rather disgustingly I might add).
His carefully constructed life is disrupted when his sister Sissy (Carey Mulligan) arrives on his doorstep unannounced (though you do note that she calls him a number of times but he ignores the phone) with her life in tatters.
Some of the graphic nature I refer to can be seen in his utter disinterest in his sister's plight and his disgust in her presence getting in the way of his 'pursuits'.
This doesn't sound like a great movie, does it? Well, you've got to look deeper.
Fassbender is remarkable in this film, his detachment is scary and while the subject matter is what it is, you can easily transfer it to other types of addiction.
Carey Mulligan is also excellent, Sissy is troubled in different ways and unlike her brother she is aware of the emotional connection that sex implies (to most people). Ironically, this is what causes her a lot of problems.
The two actors have to carry the film (particularly Fassbender) and while it's not easy viewing it is a very compelling, sometimes dire, examination of addition and its ramifications. The final scene is stunning as well.
While I couldn't say 'rush out and see this' I'll say it will probably be in my top 5 at the end of the year. An 8.5 out of 10.

Thursday, May 24, 2012

Slight retreat

I gave it a go and I'm going to have to make a retreat.
After about 10 days off the anti-depressants I'm going back on them, at a lower dose, because I think that I went off them too fast and the body hasn't appreciated it.
Feeling a bit crummy from time to time, stomach upsets and a spacey kind of feeling are telling me that perhaps I was premature in tapering off them. There's a chance that it's not related but it is too much of a coincidence that I can't ignore it as a possibility.
Of course, there is the thought in the back of my head that there could be a relapse of the Crohn's Disease about to happen....I know I've had that fear before and it never eventuated, and at this stage it is only a small possibility.
I don't mind going back on the tablets for a while, perhaps I do need them though I didn't like taking them.
My hope now is that things settle back down shortly, the longer things go on the more uneasy it would make me.
I was proud of myself for getting off them, and I still am, but in hindsight a bit more consultation with the GP or chemist might have been wise.

Monday, May 14, 2012

Confirmation

It's always good to get the news you were expecting, but also there's a sense of relief regardless of how certain you are of the outcome.
So with confirmation that all is good I move forward.
The success of the next step will be known in a day or two but, again, I don't anticipate any dramas there. The tapering has been working well and I'm basically taking nothing now as it is so the body isn't going to start missing it now.
I'm kinda proud of myself.

Sunday, May 13, 2012

Moments of truth

I have a few things happening this week that could prove to be interesting and potentially dramatic.
This will be the week that I farewell the anti-depressant drugs I've had to take for the best part of seven years having successfully tapered down to 1/8th of what I was on a few months back.
One more step and that will be taken in two days.
I'm not a novice when it comes to getting test results either and I have some coming up this week also that I'm not overly concerned about but it is still nice to get the all clear.
I don't want to sound overconfident. But I'm certainly not as concerned as I was the night before getting my big diagnosis when all I could think was ''what if I have cancer?''.
Wish me luck.....